Smokers Anon

As stated earlier, I have been a smoker for 50 years.  It is a terrible, smelly, time-wasting habit.  But smoking has clung to me like a newborn and been part of all my adult life.From time to time, I tried all the recommended ideas to give up smoking.  I would like to share with you my experiences and my own thoughts on what works, at least, for me.

A Smoke and Me.

 I am or was a long term smoker. I have smoked all of my adult life.  Smoking has been my companion over good times and bad.

I was sixteen when I started smoking.  My boyfriend at that time was a smoker and didn’t like girls smoking.  Foolishly, I suggested that either he could give it up or I would take it up.  So began our long smoking history.  We have been together now for more than 50 years and smoked for 99% of that. 

In the early days when smoking was the “cool” thing to be doing, I smoked everywhere - in bed, in the car, with coffee, after meals, everywhere.  I was even able to smoke in hospital when I had my children or various operations. But as the tide turned and the dangers became evident, it was outside only and I restricted my smoking to my own domain.  The smoke filled pubs and Clubs became a thing of the past.

The anti-smoking signs went up everywhere and like all smokers I would see that forbidding sign and rush to light up.  The quips around me would be “That’ll kill you, you know”. And like all good smokers, I would reply “Well something has to”. But it was the guilt that got to me. I worried that my children may suffer one day because they grew up in a smoke-filled environment and eventually, there were grandchildren.  Maybe if we hadn’t smoked, our children would have had a more prosperous life, who knows!  In the middle of the night, the guilt creeps up and you race out of bed to have another smoke to defy the odds. 

It isn’t the nicotine that is hard to kick; it’s the habit of smoking.  Every action, every emotion all my adult life has been accompanied by a smoke.  You have a smoke while you’re on the phone, while you’re cooking dinner or as a reward when you’ve finished a job. When things get on top of you, you reach for your smokes.  Ingrained, lifetime habits that are very hard to change.  

I have tried all of the recommended methods such as tablets, patches, hypnotism etc and they all worked for a short time.  The longest period was six years after a “Smokenders” course but my father had a stroke and whilst I waited at the hospital for news, a kind old gent said-“Here have a smoke, love.  It’ll make you feel better”. Without a thought, I had that smoke lit up, puffing away and chatting to my kind mate.  By the next day, I was back up to a packet. 

I am amused when you are recommended to think of yourself as a non-smoker when giving up.  If you have been a smoker, you can’t become a non-smoker.  Rather you need to think of it like alcoholism – you are a recovering or recovered smoker.  Just like an alcoholic can’t take even one drink, you can’t take just one smoke.  Don’t kid yourself!

Your Journey.

When I talk about giving up smoking, it is mainly to assure those who have tried to quit or who are thinking about quitting that they can quit.  In fact, life can be very pleasant once you are over the worst.  For a start, you are no longer a social pariah and you may be a more interesting person.  Sometimes the activities that we use to replace smoking can lead to a broader conversational contribution. 

Nicotine addiction, as any of the quit sites will tell you is a serious addiction.  Quitting is hard and you need strong motivation to succeed.  When you have made up your mind that you wish to stop, start researching.  Go to every site you can find and look up all the different information that is available.  You will find that there may be extra or different aspects of giving up on different sites. Get a thorough understanding of your addiction. Explore all that you can, paying particular attention to the support services and quit smoking aids that are available.  Your doctor can help you to obtain your chosen method.  Accept all and every help available to accompany you in your quitting journey.

People around you may not be that sympathetic either because they have never smoked or because quitting for them may have been easier.  Quitting is an individual journey and what has worked for others may not work for you.  Sometimes it takes many tries before you succeed and recovered smokers who mention how easy it was for them, may not mention how many times before they tried and didn’t succeed. People who have never smoked find it difficult to understand the severity of nicotine addiction. Ignore them all, this is your journey, you are in control of it and it will happen your way.

I tried many times and many different ways until I succeeded. There is no right or wrong way but it is important that you find a focus that works for you.  It is important that you concentrate on something gained rather than something lost. That focus may be to save money, or get fit or to prevent others from suffering from your smoking. Whatever, your focus is, set yourself some manageable goals towards it.  For example, if saving money is your focus, then set yourself a target that you will achieve say in the first month and break that up into weekly targets.  If getting healthy or fit is the focus, then likewise target your actions, perhaps, setting a fitness level that can be achieved over a month in weekly installments. Don’t look too far ahead but simply succeed each day.  Above all be kind to yourself, and appreciate small victories. In my next post, I will lay out my three week plan.

My Plan to Quit Smoking.

My Quit plan sets a Quit date three weeks ahead instead of the usual two weeks. 

First Week

For the first week, start identifying those times when you accompany your ‘smoke’ with some other action like drinking coffee or after a meal etc.  These need to be changed so that you wait 30 minutes after the usual time before having your smoke.  This includes the period immediately after you get up. 

You also need to have your cigarette in the most uncomfortable circumstances that you can – e.g. outside in the cold.  Try to vary these places as much as possible.  Walk around, move around and generally try to break the association between certain actions or places and having your cigarette.  Stop smoking inside and when you are driving.  Clean the car out so that it smells nice once again.

Whilst you are having your smoke, have a mantra that you say over and over again –

“This tastes and smells horrible.  I’m not enjoying this smoke one bit”.

Try to notice how bad it tastes, how it leaves your mouth hot, dry and yucky.  Go and clean your teeth to get rid of the taste if possible.

Start walking twice a day preferably morning and evening.  It doesn’t matter whether this is for 10 minutes or 30 minutes.  The important part is to push yourself out there.  Walking is a great de-stressor plus exercising your will power to get out there strengthens it for when you stop smoking. But don’t let the weather put you off – get out there, even if it is raining, in your wet weather gear. 

Second Week

Continue your pattern from Week 1.but start to extend those times of not smoking from 30 minutes to 60 minutes after the usual coffee or on waking etc.  This is the week, you may start to use your Quit Smoking Aid if you are using one.  Extend your walking time by another 10 minutes and devise a plan for distracting yourself when you have cravings.  I had what I called ‘5minute jobs’.  I would wander around with a dishcloth and wipe down a bench or the fridge or whatever.  You may like to pull some weeds or watch tv.  It doesn’t matter as long as you can distract yourself for a short time.  If you’re working perhaps you can stop and talk to a colleague for a few minutes until the craving passes. If you can’t think of anything else then have a drink of water or clean your teeth. 

Third Week

You should now have a pattern set up of walking, distracting yourself and smoking less.  This week, continue as you have for the past two weeks.  But now, when you have a smoke, only have a couple of puffs and put it out.  You can keep it if you like for the next time or throw it away.  This is your choice as long as you limit how many puffs you have.  If you find that you are still unsettled with only a few puffs then eat an apple or some nuts or something else that is crunchy and needs to be chewed well. Whatever, you choose, eat slowly.  This helps to replace the mouth action of smoking.  Before your quit day, as all the best advice says, get rid of all smokes, clean the ashtrays and try to get a good night’s sleep.

Quitting.

Remember, you do this one day at a time.

For every day that you don’t buy a pack of cigarettes, buy something else for yourself instead like a book or magazine that you like or buy ham instead of devon-whatever you like. Remember that you would spend this money on cigarettes if you were smoking.  I suggest spending it each day rather than saving because that gives you the immediate benefit rather than waiting for it to accumulate.  Other things you could do are paying that amount off your credit card or mortgage even though these are relatively small amounts to pay at the time, it is the action of doing something worthwhile with your money that is important and it works best if it follows the pattern of buying smokes.

Keep walking and distracting yourself by doing something different or by drinking water or brushing your teeth.  Drinking extra fluids helps to flush the nicotine out of your system and brushing your teeth all the time keeps that nice clean feel in your mouth.  I found that for those times when you were with others or had particularly strong cravings, the ECigarette worked for me but I didn’t use the nicotine capsules only the other flavoured ones.  It gave me something to do with my hands and my mouth.  Just a couple of puffs on that and I was over the worst.  At the end of the week, take stock of what you have gained either in fitness or financial or towards the goal you had set for yourself. 

There are forums available and Quit Lines to help you become a recovered smoker.  As I said before, use any help that is available to you.  Be proud of yourself for each and every day that you are smoke free.  I hope that my tips may be useful to you.  Good Luck.